perspective

sometimes you just have to get everything out of your head in order to see straight. Its like all the stuff in there creates a fog that prevents me from seeing clearly. When it stays in my head it stews, like crazy stew, but when I get it out I realize its usually a bunch of junk.

The economy isn't safe and how do I react? Out of fear. I go back and wish I had negotiated, stood up for myself. I wasn't thinking clearly because I was thinking in fear. I claim faith and trust as pillars of my life but how often do I act on them. It's more about talking the talk instead of walking the walk. I have examples of God's faithfulness but every time a challenge is posed it's like I'm back at square one. I guess that's the human condition of forgetfulness that we are all equipped with. I wish I had a new manual.

I pick at every aspect of my life and I'm not satisfied. I get into these places of looking at my life and not hitting my own standards. I know I'm my worst critic and I need to just take life on life's terms. Sometimes I feel like a 3 year old because things aren't going my way. Me, me, me. And I blame other people for being selfish.

It was nice to be validated tonight. I have to take stock and take satisfaction in that. Listen and apply my own words of wisdom. Live in the light, love, and peace. Seize the blessings I have and laugh a little. My circumstances will never be enough. I need to let them go.